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BearCY's guide – in the simplest way – on how to perform correct pronunciation of the 29 letters in the Norwegian alphabet and more easily get understood by a Norwegian, seen from an English point of view.

bearcy.no Please click to get to the top of this page.

I have let myself get inspired by lots of Norwegian and English language videos on Facebook Instagram, and TikTok; like https://www.tiktok.com/@karikarismatic, to fix and adjust this list and which is a new revision of a simiilar list that I wrote on my timeline on Facebook, on December the 6th in 2021, to another occasion.

Since it entailed as much work as it did, I thought it best not to waste it, but to share it here, so that even more people may benefit from its insight:

(This document has been characterised by a Norwegian reader to be "a mind-f*ck" and may by some people take some time and effort or several rereads to digest. For others it may even seem hysterical funny. And yet for others, just as silly garbage. Please feel free to make up your own mind about it!

BjørnFJ sin veileder – om hvordan tilegne seg korrekt uttale av de 29 bokstavene i det norske alfabetet og som engelsktenkende lettere gjøre seg forstått av en nordmann, sett ut fra en engelsk synsvinkel. Men det kan faktisk også ha noe for seg å lese for nordmenn som kan engelsk fra før, for lettere å lære seg å uttale engelsken sin mer korrekt i et forsøk på å gjøre seg mindre synlig som utlending og lettere å gjøre seg forstått. For eksempel noe så enkelt som å uttale det engelske ordet "does" med norsk uttale som «dazz» i stedet for – som vi har lært det på skolen – «døss».

Jeg har latt meg inspirere av alle mulige slags språkvideoer på Facebook, Instagram, TikTok; som https://www.tiktok.com/@karikarismatic, X og SnapChat, til å revidere, pynte på- og skrive denne lista om flere ganger; da den er en nyrevisjon av et innlegg som jeg først publiserte i tidslinja mi på Facebook, den 6. desember i 2021, men til en annen anledning. Dette er for min del bare for moro: Siden jeg etter noe tid oppdaget at den imidlertid hadde medført såvidt mye arbeid, så tenkte jeg det var best å dele den her, slik at enda flere kan tilegne seg glede av den.

Jeg har nok oppdatert og pynta på den noe mer siden da; også med bokmerker og linker, ettersom det rett som det er dukker opp flere assosiasjoner til ting å tilføye. Dette er ikke noe som jeg dveler ved kontinuerlig, bare når det faller meg inn, i det minste for meg tilsynelatende helt tilfeldig, samt når jeg orker og har overskudd til det: (Dette dokumentet har blitt vurdert av en leser å være «forvirrende» eller hva han kalte det et «sinnskn*ll» på engelsk og kan for enkelte ta noe tid eller opptil flere gjennomlesninger å fordøye. For andre kan det til og med synes å være hysterisk morsomt. Og for enda noen igjen, bare som bortkasta kjedelig tøv eller ufornuftig og bortkasta babbel. Føl deg fri til å gjøre deg opp din egen mening!)

The Norwegian 29 letter alphabet's pronunciation explanation in English:

A in Norwegian is only being pronounced as a stand-alone R or like the A in ARE, ASS CAN'T FART, BAR, FAR, JAR, MASK, STAR and TAR,
or like the first A in BARBARIC (where the last one pronounced like a Norwegian Æ), the first part of the diftoned I in CLIMB, LINE, PINE, SPINE, and WiNE, like the O in ABOUT, ANOTHER & OTHER, JOHN, the first O in JOHNSON and LONDON (while their last O are being pronounced like a Norwegian E), and in Texan pronounced DOLLAR (where the A in English is being pronounced like a Norwegian E), and like the OU in COURAGE and YOUNG.
The Nowegian word «tak»; which means "roof" in English, is being pronounced with the long A in the English pronounced word MASK or maybe more similar to the also here (not the UK-English, which pronounces it like chauk or tauk! But a) Texan US-English pronounciated with a silently rendered L in words like "CHALK" or even better with "TALK"?,
while «takk»; which may mean "thanks" or "thank you", is being pronounced with the short U in BUS, BUZZ, F*CK, FUSS, and PUSS, and and have got an eirie similarity with the also Texan US-English pronunciation of the name mr. TUCK. Like the American name; "Tucker Carlson", pronounced in this dialect, would have had to be spelled like «Takker Karls'n» for a native Norwegian analphabet in English to pronounce it correctly, like the guy pronounces his name, himself.
The name "Donald John Trump"; as he pronounces it himself, would in Norwegian similarly have had to be spelled like: «Dan'ld Dzjan Tramp», to be pronounced correctly by an English illiterate Norwegian.


B is being pronounced like the B in BEAR, BANANA, and BARBARIC.
Never like a V; like they do in Spanish (and did in Latin), which makes Spanish speaking people really difficult to understand while speaking Norwegian or English and subconsciously keeping this speech impediment sometimes; since we in our language have got surprisingly many otherwise similarly pronounced words that mean totally different things when being pronounced with either a B or a V, which sometimes even end up resulting in long lasting stupidely bitter cultural conflicts.
Isn't it weird how fear always ends up escalating things to end up getting seemingly unforgivably evil and out of hand?
To pronounce a city name like "Bangkok" correctly for a Thai-, and English-illiterate Norwegian; to pronounce it with a US-English accent, it would have had to be spelled as «bængkák»; but for a UK-English- and Thai accent, it would have had to be spelled like «bængkåk». While most English-illiterate Norwegians naturally read and pronounce the correct spelling of the name like it actually would have been spelled like «bangkåkk» with a short both "a" and "å"


C; like in English, is being pronounced like an S without using the vocal cords; whenever it's in front of not only an E, I, and a Y, and in front of an Æ or an Ä (which is actually a Finish-, Swedish- or German spelled Æ, with almost the same rules of pronunciation), but also in front of the A in words like the originally French word  "façade"; which should actually have been spelled like this even in English, and not like "facade"; even if this is how it most usually is being spelled in English, even if it still is being pronounced like an unvoiced S. The cedille (¸) in the French language is to be put under any C that we pronounce like an unvoiced S, but only when it is written in front of any other letter than the above four mentioned at the top of the C pharagraph. In Norwegian, this has been solved by spelling the same word with the same meaning, as «fasade».
C is pronounced like a K when it's in front of any other letter or space. (Cæsar is being pronounced like sésar with Norwegian pronounced Ss, E, A, and R.)


D is being pronounced like the D in DAVID. When D is being written in front of a J, the D is rendered unpronounced and silent, and the J being pronounced as explained below. When D is written in front of a T, the D is also rendered silent, and the word being pronounced as with a short vowel and a double following consonant, as in «godt»; which means "good" in English, and in Norwegian is being pronounced like «gått» or like "gaut" would have been pronounced in English, even if this particular word doesn't have any logical meaning in English that I am aware of.

E is being pronounced like the A in DOLLAR, mr. IAN and in YEAR, and like all the E in BEEN, BEN, BENDED BELLS, BETTER DECKS, DENTED EGGS, MEN, SHELLS, and WOMEN. Also like the second or last O in English pronounciated JOHNSON and LONDON (while their first Os are being pronounced like a Norwegian A).
In some special words (just to make the Norwegian language extra confusing!) like the first E in «gjerde», which means "fence" and in «jern»; which means "iron" and «sperm»; which has got the same meaning in English (although in English is's being pronounced with a Norwegian Ø-vowel), all these Es are in Norwegian being pronounced like a Norwegian normally pronounced Æ.


F is only being pronounced like the Fs in FABOLOUS, F*CK OFF, and being OFF course or lost, like the GH in LAUGH and COUGH or the PH; like in PHALLOS, PHANTOM, philoSOPHY, panic-pornoGRAPHY, or photoGRAPHY. F is never being pronounced like a Norwegian V, like we are used to prounouce it in English as in "of" like in "of course". Only like an F, like in "off course"; which have got a completely different meaning («ute av kurs»).

G is mainly being pronounced like the G-s in the English pronounced words GET, GOD and GOOD.
In conjunction with a J, as in «GJENganger» and «GJERde», the G is rendered silent, and the J is being pronounced like an English pronounced Y.
In conjunction with any N; as in «gagn» and «gang», it is being pronounced like the NG is being pronounced in the word "ENGLISH". (Although «gagn» is being pronounced like English spelled "GUNG'N" with an additional N at the end, and like the U in the word UP. As the Norwegian word «gagn» only means "what's being good for you", while the word «gang»; depending on its use, may mean "way of walking", "succession", "moment in time", "corridor", or "entrance".)

H is only being pronounced like the Hs in laughter written like HA-HA-HA!, HE-HE-HE!, HI-HI-HI!, HO-HO-HO!, HU-HU-HU, HY-HY-HY!, and in English words like HAM, HAVE, HAVENS, HAWK, HORRIBLE, et cetera.
«Heyerdahl» is a Norwegian family name with many rather prominent and famous members. This name would, however in US-Engilsh, have had to be spelled like "HYERDOL"; to mistakenly and involuntarily by native US-English thinking people stumble upon acquiring the name's correct Norwegian pronunciation, without even realising it. (As heard pronounced by several differenet vocies in the Babylon5 S02E15 «And Now for a Word», in a sentence beginning from 1m42s into the episode, as the name of a shuttle craft or a transport vessel of some sort, transporting the Inter Stellar Network News (ISN) to Babylon5 for their first survey report.)
(
-I wonder why this series was removed from the streaming services right after I first posted this document? Just to spite my silliness, perhaps? Explaining things that shouldn't be explained, for some reason?
It is, however, currently available on Amazon Prime Video but only via a VPN set on USA.

I is being pronounced like the A in COURAGE, like the E in to BE, like the I in FISH, mr. IAN, IS, IT, and MAGAZINE, like the the EA-s in mr. BEAN and SEA, the EE in to PEE (or WEE?) and to SEE and to be SEEN, like the Es in FECES, HE, SHE, and WE, or like the O in WOMEN (!).
For a Norwegian thinking reader with no Texan English experience to pronounce "God's people" correctly, it would have had to be spelled: «Gads pipel». To pronounce it correctly in Australian- or British English, it would have had to be spelled: «Gådds pipel».

J is mainly being pronounced just like an English Y. So just swap them in your mind while reading. (My family name, «Jespersen», is for example being pronounced by any Norwegian, Dane or Swede, like "YÉSPÉSH'N", with the E-s pronounced like explained above.) J written in conjunction with an S as in «sjø»; which means "sea", is being pronounced like the SH and the Ø like explained below. J in conjunction with a K is being explained below. J in conjunction with an S and a K, as in «skjære», which; depending upon context, may mean to "cut" or a "magpie", is being pronounced with a SH and an A like in MAN, a rolling R, and an E like the first ones in MESMERISE at the end.

K is being pronounced like a K. Except when a K (or a T) is written alone in front of a J. Then the combination is being pronounced like the CH-part of the German words ICH and DICH; pronounced by a native German, which means I and thine (It becomes simpler to pronounce this sound correctly when whispering while pronouncing my family name. When you as loudly as possible whisper the English word YES, the first sound is similar to the Norwegian KJ- (or TJ-) sound.)

L is being pronounced like three different Ls. Not just two like in English. Firstly like the L in clue, secondly like the L in Paul, and thirdly like the thick, sort of "RD"-sounding L, pronounced by some Pakistani- or East-Indian people; with the tongue tip rolling outward. Whenever L is written in front of a J, the L is rendered silent, and the J is being pronunced like a Y.

M is being pronounced like all the Ms in MAINSTREAM MEDIA.

N is being pronounced like the N in BAND and NEWS. Except when in conjunction with a G; as explained above. Whenever written following a K, both consonants are to be pronounced out aloud equally. There are no silent Ks in Norwegian, except when written following an S or followed by a J; as being explained above.

O is being pronounced like the long OO in "king's English" COOL, POOL, STOOLS and TOOLS, whenever followed by a single consonant or space. Whenever followed by a double consonant, it is however being pronounced like a short Å. As always, there are local dialectic exceptions to confirm this rule.

P is being pronounced like the P in Paradise and Paul, even when it's being written in front of an H; like in the name «Aspheim»; which means "aspen home", like in the tree species. The A in Aspheim is being pronounced like the A in king's English pronounced ARE, ASS CAN'T FART, RAFT or CRAFT. The E in Aspheim starts out as being pronounced like a Norwegian pronounced Æ, merging in difton with the I, which is being pronounced as if it had been swithced by an English Y. The H is being pronounced as distinctly as the Hs in "ASP-HEIM" "TRUMP-HOME" or "PLUMP-HONEY". In other words; quite a confusing trap, that name, Aspheim. Also for German speaking people, who seemingly automatically pronounce it like king Charles would have pronounced the word, "ASS-FYME". (Which is why we term his vernacular "king's English" today as opposed to "queen's English" like we temed it while queen Elizabeth the second still were alive.)
But whenever a P is written in front of an S; in foreign imported words like «psykologi» (meaning "psychology"), it's being rendered silent and is not to be pronounced at all. Seemingly just like magic.

Q is only being pronounced like a K in Norwegian.

R is in the north part, in the Capital, and in the east part of Norway, being pronounced like the Rs of Italy, Spain, southern France, and southern Germany. While in the west and south parts of Norway, it is mainly being pronounced like the Rs of Paris and Berlin; due to a speech impeechment by a French royal a couple of centuries ago, that became popularised by the most terrified of making a fool out of themselves, so that they in this manner deprived themselves of any other consequence.
Whenever an R is written in front of a D, it is being pronounced like a thick (East-Indian?) L, where the tongue is rolling outwards instead of inwards or standing still.
Whenever an R is written in front of an S, the combination is usually being pronounced like a SH.


S is never being pronounced like an English Z; but like an English C before an E, I or Y, without the vocal cords.
Whenever an S is written in front of a J or a KJ, the combination is being pronounced like a SH.
Sometimes when S is written in front of an L; like in the Norwegian word, «slag» (a "blow"), «slegge» (a "sledge hammer") or «slå» (to "hit"), this combination is on the east side of Norway being pronounced like "SHLAU" would have been pronounced in English, if it meant anything. On the south- and west side of Norway; however, they usually pronounce the S and L separately, like in English, and with no SH-sound.

(Which is why the uneducated part of the Norwegian population tend to mispronounce the name of their capital like "ooshrdoo" instead of "oosloo"; like the origin of the name demands, since it actually consists of two separate words. It is derived from the Viking old Norwegian or Norse words «ås»; which in this case means a hill or the "gods" and «lo», which means a "meadow". Which is why the name Oslo originally means "meadow of the gods". Later fabulations of the capital's name's origin tells us that it comes from the seeped (which in Norwegian is spelled like «os» and is pronounced like "oos") in the «Lo»-river; pronounced just like an English "loo". And even that explanation would prevent the SL in Oslo to be pronounced like SHRD. When the Germans heard that we would rename our capital city from Kristiania to Oslo from January the 1st in 1925, however, they couldn't believe their ears: In German Oslo is namely being pronounced just like the native pronouncication of the German word that means "asshole".)


T is always being pronounced like a T, except when written in front of a J. Then it's being pronounced like the Norwegian KJ-sound, which is being explained above.

U is being pronounced like the E in DEW, the U in SUPERB or like the OO in LIVERPOOL; as it's being pronounced by one of its native urchins.
Whenever being written before a double consonant, it is however being pronounced in Norwegian like an O. With dialectic exceptions to confirm the rule.
The Norwegian word «DU», which means thou (or singular you), is being pronounced just like DEW is being pronounced in English.

V is being pronounced like the F in OF COURSE and like the V in VICTORY; although in some German names; like «Vogts gate» (bailiff's [in German] street [in Norwegian]) and «Vaterland» (pronounced "fàterlànd" which is German and meaning a sort of upside-down "male gendered" motherland), it's only being pronounced like an F or like the "PH" in English, as in phantom, phallos, phantom, or  philosophy in German, never in native Norwegian.
(The German name VolksWagen is similarly both to be pronounced and have a similar meaning in English like "folk's wagon" with a rather strange emphasis on the L or "folk's-vàg'n, with a long open A like in the English word "MASK", and a short unemphasised E, pronounced like in the English word "END" at the end. "Folk's" is being pronounced with an emphasised, and a far more pronounced L, than in English, where it is rendered almost silent. In Norwegian this German car's name is «folkevogn».)

W; as in German, is only being pronounced like the Norwegian pronunciation of the single V.

X is being pronounced like "KS". or like "CC" in "access" or "CS", since C is only being pronounced as an S in front of an E, I, Y, Æ, and Ä.
In some words, like «xylofón»; which means xylophone, the X is only being pronounced like an S without the vocal cords.

Y is being pronounced like an EE while shaping your lips like when you're pronouncing an OO. Somewhat difficult to explain. Almost like a Ü being pronounced by a native German, or like in the French word UNE by a native Frenchman.

Z is like the S usually being pronounced like an English C in front of an E, I, or a Y; without the vocal cords.

Æ is being pronounced like the A in AS, BAG, BAN, CAN, FAN, MAD MAN, AND SPAM. And like the E in TERRor.
In some words, like «Cæsar»; which means emperor, and «sæd»; which means semen, is however being pronounced like the E in END.
The second A in the word barBARic" is pronounced in English like a Norwegian Æ-sound. (For an English iliterate Norwegian to pronounce this word correctly in English, it would have had to be spelled like «BA-BÆRRIK».)
The name "Kamala Devi Harris" would; to be prounounced correctly by an English illiterate Norwegian, have had to be spelled like: «Kam'la Déivi Hærris».

Ä is just a Swedish or German spelled Æ, but they do mainly have the same or similar rules of pronunciation. Æ is spelled in the English- and -French languages as an AE, which is why I have selected this replacement for the Æ in the bookmark links settings, to keep this page world wide compatible, not expecting everyone to know how to produce Danish- and Norwegian special wowel letters.

Ø is concistently being pronounced like the EA in EARN, LEARN and to YEARN; like the E in CERTainly HER, JERK, MERCK and suPERB; like the I in FIRM, FIRST, and SIR, like the O in WORD, WORK, and WORLD; like the OU in JOURNey; or like the U in BURN, CHURN, CURtain, CURtesy, FUR, TURN and URN.
Ö is just a Finish, Swedish or German spelled Danish and Norwegian Ø, but they do mainly have the same- or similar rules of pronunciation. Ø is spelled in the English and French languages as an OE (or an Œ), which is why I have selected OE as a replacement for the Ø in the English alphabet only bookmark links settings, to keep this page world wide compatible, not expecting everyone to know how to produce Danish- and Norwegian special wowel letters.


Å is being pronounced like the A in HAWK and WAR, like the AU in PAUL, SAUCE, and in of CAUSE, like the EA in master SEAN, like the O in CONNER, GOD, the first O in HORROR, and in British and Australian pronounced DOLLAR, or like the OU in both of- and off COURSE and SOURCE.
For a Norwegian English analphabet to pronounce the name "Joseph Robinette Biden junior" correctly, it would have had to be spelled «Dzjøuzeff Råbinett Baid'n dzjunia». Å was in the olden days being spelled in Danish as a double-A, which is why I have selected this replacement for the Å in the bookmark links settings, to keep this page world wide compatible, not expecting everyone to know how to produce Danish- and Norwegian special wowel letters.


.—.

As an example on how difficult English may be to learn and how inconsistently its letters are being pronounced, here is a constructed word by a an individual with English as their second language; GHOTI, which is being explained how it is to be pronounced like FISH in this rather strange manner:

F as in GH from LAUGH or CAUGH
I as in O from WOMEN (!)
SH as in TI from STATION or FacinaTIon

I suspect that this kind of dry joke; which doesn't follow any common rules of English pronunciation, only might seem funny to people who hasn't got English as their native mother tongue or primary language?

To pronounce the English word
To pronounce the French name "Versailles" correctly for a French illiterate Dane, Norwegian, Swede, or German, it would have had to be spelled like «værr-SAIJ» or «värr-SAIJ» with emphasis on the difton. To pronounce the French name "Monsieur Cadillac" correctly (with "monsieur" meaning "mylord" in English, «mein Herr» in German, or «min herre» in Scandinavian), it would have had to be spelled like «müss-jö kädiJÄKK» or «myss-jø kædiJÆKK», with emphasis on the last vowel. To pronounce the same name correctly in US-English (since this famous French guy moved to the US of A with his car company), it would have had to be spelled like «KÄDDiläk» or «KÆDDilæk», with emphasis on the first vowel.

To an XXY-autist like myself, that needs to get every kind of information "in with a tea-spoon" via direct messages of clearly pronunced words that I recognise and comprehend the meaning of, to understand anything at all; almost as dysfunctional as some sort of A.I. on a computer, I also lack the abilty to read anyone's minds, except for cats and dogs, that I have learned to read pretty well through interactive experience.)

Here's a link to my explanation on how to abolish fear, and what makes it the source of any evil and only negatively to let oneself get seduced by:
https://bearcy.no/thoughts.html#projection
Today I therefore am teaching myself how to feel pronoid instead.
Which means that we choose to believe that God (or the universe) conspires to our benefit.

I do have a hard time making myself short. Using far too many words for most people I know's comfort.
And am myself dependent upon detailed direct messages about everything from people in my surroundings, to comprehend anything at all.
I therefore ask lots of—to anyone else rather unnecessary or silly—questions; just to make sure that I haven't misunderstood anything.
Not to quarrel or try to be mean, but simply to make sure that I behave myself properly to deserve som sort of respect, because it takes som effort.
This makes social occasions a challenging thing for me, relating to people who don't know about my seemingly hidden handicap.
I'm nothing to fear; to that I am far too busy with living my own life already to grant myself time or effort to spy on or meddle with anyone else's.

Respectfully, Bjørn (pronounced b-yearn, meaning a bear), living at Romsås (pronounced room-sauce, meaning gypsy's hill) in Oslo (pronounced oosloo, meaning meadow of the dieties, or "The Gods' meadow").

To Norwegian speaking people the story about Odd Grythe who hosted a TV-show when I was younger, called «Husker du?» ("Do you remember?") with his friend Ivar Ruste, and they were having a visit by the English singer Vera Lynn. But the weather wasn't agreeable, so they came late to the directly sent show. But when they excused themselves about not being used to our Norwegian slippery winter roads, Odd Grythe blurted out with: "But, but, but, but didn't you have pigs in your decks?" What he meant to ask was; "didn't you have nails in your tyres?", but he just "Englified" the Norwegian words for it which is «pigger i dekkene», so that Vera Lynn had to have it all explained by Ivar Ruste, which was also surprisingly funny listening to for a weirdo geek like me.


Respectfully, Bjørn (pronounced "b-yearn"; the name meaning an animal bear, while incarnating a twink body that doesn't fit the description), living at Romsås (pronounced "room-sauce", meaning "gypsy's hill" or "gypsy's spirit-god"). According to the experiences and testimonials of the locals who have lived at Romsås since the 1970s,has to them been the best, safest and most generally carefree place to live; where even the (today mostly black and surprisingly consistently well behaved Muslim) sweet and helpful youth gangs, who just seem to adore feeling useful in relation to everyone. On some futuristic philosophical hunt for safe and pleasant karma, perhaps? But at the same time, Romsås has for some (possibly only commercial?) reasons, simultaneously always been portrayed in the mainstream media as a "most infamous, terrifying place that readers and listeners are adviced never to dare visiting". Maybe that's the real reason to why it's so somewhat rural and quiet here, where even the youth gangs (mostly black these days) are only polite and helpful to their elderly neighbours? After interviewing a lady that told me she had lived here since 1972, she also told me that she never had been scared of walking around Romsås even at night for as long as she has lived; "since there's only kind and considerate people that care to live around here", and I see her quite often around and about.

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